What Led Me To Choose Adoption

James worked with our friends at You Gotta Believe to pursue their dreams of fatherhood through adoption.

“I wanted to adopt a child and stumbled into the LGBT Center on 13th Street in Manhattan. They were having a training on how to become a foster/adoptive parent run by You Gotta Believe. After learning that their mission is to end homelessness by getting as many teens as possible into homes, I was hooked,” shared James.

While his biological family wasn’t interested in his fatherhood journey through adoption, James found solace and strength in his chosen family. Still, though, there were doubts.

“Always! And still. I overcome the doubt by meditating, I just bring my focus back to what I am doing. When I am unclear and have doubts of what i’m doing, I talk to friends and then start again.”

When pursuing adoption, James decided to adopt an older teen. He remembers facing discrimination from other LGBT+ parents. “I started going to a dad’s group at The Center and found that the others didn’t view me as a dad since I was adopting a teen.”

Adoption Aftermath

As a family, they got through it and bonded well. “We started with movies and then we added two-step dancing at Big Apple Ranch. He was 17 at the time and also enjoyed reading.”

“My favorite part of being a dad is feeling the connection between him and myself as well as seeing the positive impact I have on him. Being a dad is a journey of finding yourself. I have found myself becoming more authentic and a better person by being a dad to my son.”

@i.den.t.t