David and Elio: Dads Through Adoption
Texas husbands David Lara and Elio Palomares have been together for 12 years, and they both said they always wanted to experience fatherhood.
As the couple neared their 40s, they started the journey to parenthood by getting certified as foster parents in their hometown of San Antonio. Now, they are adoptive dads to five gorgeous kids.
Even before they were foster parents, both husbands were caregivers in their careers too; David is a teacher, and Elio is a nurse.
They said the foster care system was by no means an easy way to form their family. But the couple knew that there were children out there who needed loving parents like them.
“Throughout fostering, we were pulled in so many directions and we were often giving up hope in having a forever family of our own,” David explained. “We just continued to love and provide for the kids, and it just came our way to finally be that forever family.”
Elio and David worked with Pathways Youth and Family Services, which they said they would definitely recommend to other gay dads-to-be. “They guided us in everything we needed and helped us with our dreams,” Elio added.
Eventually, seven siblings were placed in their home for foster care. Sadly, the dads were not allowed to adopt all of them together.
“They’d only allowed us to adopt 6 kids, so unfortunately we could only proceed with 5, in the hopes of not leaving one all alone,” David explained. “We didn’t want to separate them and fought so hard through a long process, but the final word was only adopting these 5.”
Their five children, 12-year-old Miguel, 8-year-old Christian, 6-year-old Sasha, 4-year-old Sebastian, and 3-year-old Aiza, were all adopted together in November 2019.
The dads said their children love playing outdoors and having family movie nights.
“We are a happy family that are full of moments that are building unforgettable memories,” Elio said. “We would not change it for the world. Our children are our top priority now, and everything we do, we do it for them.”
For David, the hardest part of being a dad has been balancing his time and providing individualized moments with each child. But he said the best part of being a dad is seeing the joy and smiles on their faces everyday.
Thankfully, on both sides of their family, David and Elio have had tremendous support since they started fostering. They had lots of friends in their support system too. Without them, David said things would be much harder.
“All our family and friends were very supportive in our decision to become dads,” Elio said. “They were always there for support and guidance.”
The couples’ advice for other gay men considering starting a family through foster-to-adopt is to never give up on your dreams of having a forever family. “All things are possible if you push for it,” David said.